How to Stay Focused on What Matters

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As things are opening up, you can feel the pressure to have to get to it and get it all done. Though we are still living within constraints and lots of political conflict with the COVID issue (and everything resulting from it), It can be difficult knowing what to focus on in your life and what next steps to take.
 This is where the heart comes in.
Your heart is the centre part of your true self. It knows who you are, what you want, what you don’t want and what will stress you out.

Often it gets swayed by things like comparing yourself to others, responding to fear and anxiety just to quell the fires, and feeling emotionally overwhelmed.

When you make your heart your friend, it is your guiding light during difficult times.
Your heart wants to feel at peace, connected, happy, loved and heard. When you don’t prioritize those aspects in your decision-making, it leads to stress, burnout, resentment, and depression/anxiety.

If you were to look at those basic wants of the heart, again (to feel at peace, connected, happy, loved and heard), and your heart, what area does it feel lacking in right now, you’ll be surprised by quickly it responds to you. You just know. Then ask yourself “what is one thing I can do to feel more _____________ in my work, home, relationships or other area).

When you stay focused on getting that need met, you really start seeing magic happen in your life. You start prioritizing that need and you take control of your own inner power.

If you are facing a plate load of decisions right now, I encourage you to pick one decision you need to make and ask your heart, “what do you need me to do about this so you feel more at peace, connected, happy, loved or heard?”

And let me know how it goes — does this help? Just send me a quick email to: heather@blossomingheart.ca

New Moon: A Second Chance to Go Within & Find Home

As if Mercury in Retrograde and a Cancer Sun Sign wasn’t enough, we actually have a second New Moon in Cancer coming up on July 20th.   

This is a second chance to look at your relationships, your sense of home and your roots. Are you content with where you are? Are you denying your need for others in your life? Are you hurting from family difficulties?


This is a time to do the emotional healing work as well as to reflect on the past (as Cancer is a feminine sign connected to the moon) without getting stuck there. You may need to do some grieving around mother issues, hurts from past relationships or face some of the uglies of our human history (as we are seeing with the powerful Black Lives Matter movement).

This is a time to re-define your standards of how you want to be treated, who do you want in your circle of care, and what bigger issues you stand for that make your community a safer, kinder and more loving place.

Whether you do ritual on the New Moon or not, this is a wonderful time to set new intentions from what you have learned in this past month about yourself and the places you call home or tribe. You, like anyone else, deserves to feel safe, loved and understood.

If you need some support during this time, you may want to book a Re-charge Your Heart Session to help you move from overwhelmed to centred & calm.

Why Validation is So Important

As caring and sensitive hearts, we tend to hold everything in because we don’t like conflict or we don’t want to burden others.

Yet many know that stuffing your feelings can actually lead to mental and physical health problems like depression, over- or under-eating, substance abuse or just generally feeling lonely. It can also lead to chronic illness, as many holistic practitioners will attest, because the body is the densest part of us and responds on a primal level to things like threat and anger. 

You are probably the one who validates many in your circle, but do you have those around you who can validate your own personal challenges, hurts or upset? 

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It’s an amazing feeling when you feel heard and understood. Your heart can lift, your nervous system feels supported and safe, there is a sense of trust and openness, and your own inner wisdom can integrate in your life. All of a sudden you just feel loved and cared for.

If you are noticing that you don’t have many around you who “get you”, then it’s time to reach out to new groups, coaches, people or situations. 

No one person can fully meet our needs or show that they understand every part of our path, but you can notice the difference in your life if you feel good or relaxed or easy to share your stories when you are around certain people. It’s what creates the strong circle of support we all need and yearn for in our lives. 

Validation is what makes my sessions magical.  I tune in at a deeper level to understand what lives beneath the surface and in your heart’s truth. Often we put on a mask to the world of who we think we should be but quietly we are holding things inside and hiding our true selves. In a Sweet Aha’s session, you will be naturally understood at a level of your emotions and life experiences that will help you to move towards more self-acceptance, setting truly empowering goals that motivate you, and help you fall into deeper relaxation and self-understanding. You will open up to a more caring Universe because of it. 

How to Deal with News that Makes Your Heart Hurt

Oh us sensitive hearts. We try so much to understand, connect, care and be aware. We want to be a compassionate presence in the world, yet we live in a world that has a lot of issues that can be heartbreaking, to say the least.

Finding a balance of staying informed about the real suffering in the world while not becoming debilitated is a challenging one.  

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This is especially true during this time of crisis where we are hearing many heart-wrenching news stories. 

As Highly Sensitive People and Empaths, our nervous systems and brains can only handle so much before we become entirely overwhelmed.

Below are a few tips I’ve come up with in order to help me not fall into the pit of despair. I hope they help you, too…

  1. Limit your time for scrolling on social media or accessing the news to 15 minutes at a time. This way you won’t inundate yourself with too much.
  2. See if you can find 2 or 3 reliable news sources that you trust. Having a place where you feel safety, trust and stability is important.
  3. Be sure you feel strong before you engage with the world’s problems. Try to avoid first thing in the morning or late at night as your resources are depleted and your guard is down.
  4. Notice the stories that really affect you. Chances are these are issues that are part of your path of social change and impact or are there to help you heal your own trauma. If it triggers you too much, be sure to take a step back and go for a walk or listen to some enjoyable music.
  5. Ask yourself what emotions does this bring up in you? E.g. anger, sadness, frustration, confusion, shock…
  6. Become clear about your throughts and feelings. Journal, talk to a friend, share your thoughts or opinions in a place where you feel safe.
  7. Find creative ways to express yourself — write a poem, an op ed piece, draw your feelings, dance it out, or start a project.
  8. If the issue is very personal and is stirring up a lot, seek out a counsellor or therapist to process your feelings.
  9. See if you can stay focused on one or two major issues or news stories, most likely the ones that really move you. Find ways to make change in small or big ways. It could be reading out the issue more in-depth, watching movies or documentaries, joining a group of concerned citizens, going to a protest, participating in initiatives in your community, etc.
  10. Be sure you also have time to enjoy life, have fun and take time to do what you love.
  11. Keep a good news journal — listing 3 touching things that you heard about or saw in your day.
  12. Fill up on good news stories, as well. They are out there and we need to remember that there are wonderful and caring people in this world, too. You are one of them!

If you need a little extra support to move from overwhelm to centred, click here to sign up for the free “Calm Your Anxious Heart” mini e-course.

My e-book has just been released!

A series of personal experiences and insights that show there is more to life than meets the eye. Heather shares her personal journey in becoming a medium as well as the funny and undeniable experiences with Spirit and those who have passed on. It also includes an encounter with Abe Lincoln!

Rate: $8.99 on Amazon.ca

Click Here to Purchase

New Moon: The Story of Our Relationships

Tomorrow — Friday May 22nd — is the New Moon in Gemini. Venus is also retrograde.

In a New Moon, the darkest phase of the cycle, we are called to go within to look at our own inner world. It is not a time of action, but a time of contemplation and setting intentions. We are moving into the Sun Sign of the month. So at the New Moon phase it is a powerful time to connect to the conscious and subconscious aspects of ourselves, using the dominant feature of the sign — this month being Gemini.

Gemini is the sign of the mind and intellect. Venus is the sign of love and the emotions–in retrograde it is about the heartache, rejections, or unexpressed grief in love.

This means that the old wounds about love and intimacy that we have — the places where our core hurts live — may come to surface. We have the chance to see the dis-empowering stories we have about ourselves, the mind chatter that is dominating our inner landscape. This means we may see ourselves as unlovable, undesirable, alone forever. We may see our love addiction so clearly during this time, and the amount of energy we’ve wasted with some friendships or love interests. We will need to discern what is fantasy versus what is reality.

Right in the middle of isolation. Fun, right?

When you get really honest with yourself about what is and isn’t working, and what it is you do or don’t need with your nearest and dearest, you have a chance to actually manifest grounded relationships that can honour you and the other from a place of integrity, respect and reality. In this new moon, you can transform the shadow and see yourself in a whole new light — you can see the inner strength you’ve had to survive. Or you can feel released of old guilt and shame and see how far you’ve come in self-respect. You can make new intentions for the kinds of people and dynamics you need to feel loved, supported and appreciated.

So use this powerful time today, tomorrow and Saturday to sit with yourself — journal your thoughts maybe — about love, past relationships or your current relationships.

You can ask yourself questions like:

  1. How do I really feel about this person?
  2. What am I believing about myself regarding this relationship?
  3. What do I need to feel more satisfied and peaceful?
  4. Am I being realistic about this person? What may I not be seeing about them?
  5. What are my 3 biggest needs I have to feel loved and cared about? Who do I feel is available to help me get these needs met?

And of course, you know yourself best so can come up with any other questions that may match what you are going through right now.

If you need some support, I have created a short but helpful e-course called: A Home Ceremony to Transform a Difficult Relationship. It’s only $9.99 and you have lifetime access to it. It’s powerful and offers a lot of deep insights and healing, if you are ready to go there.

I also offer a Re-charge Your Heart Session for a reduced rate during this time, if you need a more personalized touch.

Here’s to healing your heart and mind, so you can feel clear, more focused and aligned with the ways you need to feel loved and supported.

***

If you are someone who knows the importance of love, care and kindness in the world, please join A Sanctuary for Sensitive Hearts Private Facebook Group.

Free Yale Course Online: The Science of Happiness

Today — May 20th – is the day Yale opens the second round of this free online course. We could all use a dose of happiness in our lives during this time. Here’s a blurb from an article on the Global News site.

“Yale University is offering people a reprieve from the existential dread of the coronavirus pandemic: free online access to its most popular course, “The science of well-being.”

The course helps students engage in challenges that are designed to increase happiness and build more productive habits, the description says.”

“Professor Laurie Santos reveals misconceptions about happiness, annoying features of the mind that lead us to think the way we do, and the research that can help us change,” it reads. “You will ultimately be prepared to successfully incorporate a specific wellness activity into your life.”

Click Here to Join

Book of the Week: The Psychic Pathway by Sonia Choquette

If there is one spiritual mentor I love, it is Sonia Choquette. She is down-to-earth, practical and knowledgeable about developing the self and one’s intuitive abilities.

You can get it on Kindle for $4.99 US. Click Here for More Details on How to Buy…

“A practical, step-by-step, 12-week interactive program that teaches you how to develop the intuitive sense that lies within you and to live in accordance with the soul’s purpose by discovering your center of spiritual power. The Psychic Pathway refines intuition into a life-enhancing tool that can be used every day.”

If you want to be part of a group of Highly Sensitive People and Empaths, click here to join my Facebook Group, The Sanctuary for Sensitive Hearts.

Oracle Card for Week of May 17th 2020

This week’s card is from the Queen of the Moon Oracle Card Deck by Stacey Demarco.

It is the Sovereignty card which means knowing your benevolent personal power. It is all about the fact that in all situations you have power and influence and it is about shifting negative situations into ones of love, kindness and possibilities.

An interesting card as we move through feeling restricted and unsure of what’s ahead. It all starts within and it starts with you.

What healthier choices do you need to make for your life? What ways can you be a positive impact in your home, online, or in your community?

If you haven’t yet, join the Sanctuary for Sensitive Hearts Facebook Group to join our Re-charge Your Heart Sunday evening calls for free to stay aligned and in tune so you can come through this time with greater spiritual strength and deeper commitment.

Spirit Guide for Hire

In my mid 20s, I decided to backpack across Mexico with my partner at the time. I knew very basic Spanish and figured that Mexico would be the best place to go in Latin America as it was used to English-speaking tourists. 

We travelled by bus from Cancun, across the country to the Pacific Coast and finally out of Mexico City. Partway through the trip we ended up in a place called Oaxaca City, a haven for all types of artists and cultural tourists.  I felt more at home in Oaxaca City than anywhere I had lived in Canada – it fed my poetic nature. Cobblestone streets, 13 Indigenous Tribes that still practiced their pre-colonial lifestyle of 2,000 years ago, and the birthplace of Benito Juarez, the first Indigenous President who fought for democracy and education, were all part of Oaxaca’s essence.  I fell in love with the place.  Even among Mexicans, it is known as a profound and magical spot, where things appear to move slow but there is so much going on under the surface. Even though it is one of the poorest States in the country, it is soul rich.

When we had to move to our next destination, I made an oath to myself that I would return one day.

Fast forward to Toronto a couple of years later. My partner and I separated. I was working as a temp for the Government.  I really couldn’t see myself growing old in Toronto by working at a desk job. I had to make a change but I didn’t know what or how.

Oaxaca called to me, as if through the ethers. I knew I had to go back there if anything but to find my soul. I trusted that Divine guidance would help me make it happen.  Sure enough, I met someone in Canada who traveled between Oaxaca and Toronto for business reasons. He hooked up a place for me to live and reassured me that I would be just fine. His advice to me was to memorize three Spanish poems by heart and I would learn Spanish within 2 months. Which actually worked.

I packed all my belongings up, filled my backpack, and planned to live in Oaxaca City for 5.5 months, if not longer.

I also changed the name I went by to Isabel, because Heather is not easy to pronounce in Spanish.  

It was a scary, lonely and soul-delving journey as I had to navigate cultural differences, homesickness, learning a new language and being a single woman in a foreign country where Violence Against Women is a huge social problem. Also, a major political revolution broke out – the biggest one in its history – where there were mass protests of thousands of people and cops with tear gas. Buses were being lit on fire, and people were carrying weapons of all kinds.

Sticking out like a sore thumb with very little community support, I had to rely on my instincts and follow my inner compass. Meditation and a traveller’s curious mind were the attitudes that sustained me.

On one particularly difficult day, where I was questioning everything I was basing my trip on, I saw a man doing a Hail Mary in front of the Catholic Church only to turn around and whistle at me with a cat call.  The sexual harassment and hypocrisy of religion there was really getting under my skin. I wondered why this Divine Force had led me to Oaxaca City. Was I following all the wrong guidance? I felt abandoned and lost, unsure of what the hell I was doing there.

As the City I loved was being destroyed because of the growing injustices against its citizens, I was standing there questioning the major life dilemmas like: “Why me? Why was I born in Canada with relative stability while Mexicans had to endure so much hardship? Why was I inspired by art, simple living and personal relationships while others were focused on more violent pursuits? 

I wanted to fall on my knees and give up. I couldn’t make any sense or meaning of myself or my life and the pain that humanity was in.  Then I looked over at the outside orange wall of the art library where I spent a lot of my time.  On it was a graffiti message that said “Estoy Contigo, Isabel”, which translated means: “I am with you, Isabel.” There wasn’t any other graffiti on the wall. In fact, this wall was usually quite clean. Why would someone write such a message? “I am with you, Isabel.” The only explanation I had was that it was a sign from the Divine.  

Stunned, I faced forward towards the Santo Domingo Church. There are locked gates to keep random people from entering.  Wouldn’t you know, I saw a Black man wearing traditional African garb (which was highly uncommon in this part of Mexico) walking through the gate. He looked at me, smiled, then winked. His gaze was penetrating, as if comforting me and telling me that there is a whole other reality that most aren’t aware of, that exists beyond the logical mind.  As Mexicans would say: “Todo es una illusion” or “Everything is an illusion.”  Part of me wondered if I had indeed lost my mind and went into a delusional state from all the stress. The other part of me knew that these mysterious coincidences were very real.

I started laughing at myself and my anxieties. I immediately relaxed and opened up to being guided by unknown forces. And wouldn’t you know, the rest of the trip went as smooth as ever, aside from the uprisings.  As if by magic, in 5 short months, I managed to have an art exhibit at a café,  I met a wonderful art teacher who brought out my expressionistic side, and I learned Spanish to the point where I was dreaming about it.  By following kindness, beauty and a sense of peace, doors opened in ways I never would have expected.

At the end of my trip, I decided to return to Canada. I couldn’t settle in Oaxaca as a single woman amidst so much political unrest. I also had my own emotional healing to do with my family back home.  So, I caught the last bus to Mexico City before the military closed everything down. I prayed to Oaxaca’s well-loved Patron Saint Guadalupe, asking that I sit next to a decent person as I didn’t have the energy to ward off harassment.

As I settled in, an elderly man wearing a simple white-pressed cotton dress shirt sat next to me. He asked me what brought me to Oaxaca. I explained that I was on a spiritual journey and have had all these amazing and strange interactions since I opened up to the Divine. The man smiled with satisfaction and looked at me with a glint in his eye. He knew we were meant to meet. He handed me his business card that said: “El Templo Del Espiritu” (The Temple of the Spirit). Underneath his name it said: “Spirit Guide”. I just shook my head with acknowledgment of the mysteriousness of Oaxaca.

I looked at him and said: “For real? You’re a Spirit Guide?”

He smiled.

“Well you’re the perfect person to sit next to me to finish my travels in Mexico,” I laughed.

“Gracias a Dios,” we both said at the same time, the common Spanish Catholic term for giving thanks to God.

I knew why I was pulled to Mexico and Oaxaca–to give me a sense of greater faith even in the face of danger and extreme poverty.  I was to understand privilege in a very real way, and to expand my understanding of the spiritual realms beyond all the divisions and suffering. I truly came to believe that we are part of a bigger fabric and movement of life.

From travelling with an open heart and mind, I realized that every person we meet comes from the Divine whether they are aware of it or not.  You just never know who’s been hired to be your Spirit Guide and what roads will open up.

***

To stay connected and to share stories and space with other Sensitive Hearts, click here to join the “Sanctuary for Sensitive Hearts” Private Facebook Group.