Yesterday we had our first online “One Step Forward” Constellations gathering. Using an online tool can seem flat for some, but it was quite interesting how the work still brought the depth of awareness that in-person gatherings offer.
In one of the pieces, we looked at anxiety and how it passes down through the generations, especially in how we relate with it in our personality. One of the major lessons is to learn how to talk about the anxiety, rather than just living with it in silence.–because silence keeps the trauma alive. Once we can be honest with our cares, fears and concerns, and connect with others who we share a common experience with (such as our work colleagues), we fundamentally feel supported which leads to a greater sense of meaning and peace. Reaching out to others who we feel comfortable with and those who get your concerns, is one of the greatest remedies to feeling isolated and alone. Which is why we are seeing so many online communities sprouting up during this time. We feel safer in numbers.
As we are facing our own collective crisis, we can turn to face our ancestors who had anxieties in the past about their livelihoods when the world and their society changed due to unforeseen circumstances. We see those who were traumatized by losing the things they loved and poured their souls into where they had to adjust to the demands of the times. We see the ones who came together in their respective communities to share their concerns and to find creative solutions. And we hold the ones who kept what they loved in their hearts and found a way to express it and make it work. As we all look to our own place in this changing world, let us honour what our own ancestors had to go through, draw on their wisdom for us and access the support in our respective communities that can bring us together and guide the way forward to a different world.
I will share with you my own experience with my ancestors, in order to help you access your own experience with yours.
When I tuned into my ancestors, I felt gifted by a strong body and saw the inheritance of health that I’ve been given and will continue to care about. I also saw the skill of the housewives in my lineage who are giving me cleaning tips and lessons on how to stay well and nourished during this time. The men were the ones who carried the stress of the world as they felt the need to protect the nation — through them I can understand how many leaders, policymakers, workers and healthcare providers in the world are working overtime to keep our nation peaceful and safe. It helps me understand some of their basic needs to feel acknowledged and held.
I was also curious about my ancestors’ relationship to the Spanish Flu — an epidemic I knew nothing about before all this went down. It turned out that the only story was about my grandfather showing up to school each day and noticing that kids were missing because they died. The kids were usually from homes without heat or nourishing food. On both sides of the family, I’m aware that I came from families who had a certain amount of privilege to survive. I’m also aware that we have had long roots here and my ancestors and the settlers in Canada would have been responsible for the epidemic of disease that was spread to First Nations Peoples. In order to not repeat the past, I hold space, advocacy and care to ensure that history doesn’t repeat itself as we are seeing First Nations Communities being underfunded during this time.
Do you have any stories of your ancestors? What have they overcome? Do you have a sense of what you have inherited that keeps you strong in this time? What advice would they have for you? I would love to hear about it!
If you would like to join me at the next online Constellations to explore how you can release some core wounds and patterns, then send me an email to: firstname.lastname@example.org